Perfect Smile
by jacob
Summary: A story about how one thing can quickly lead to another, and a discussion on the nature of smiles as relating to the practices of Bookmen. LaviAllen Slash Shounenai Yaoi... it's a queer love story, get it?


Disclaimer—I do not own D.Gray-Man or any of its other media licensing, like anime, manga, books or music etc…

A/N—I wrote this when I should have been writing the latest chapter of Check and Balance, because I just finished watching the anime. This story is actually based off of what drew me to the anime, that sad little smile Allen wears a few seconds into the intro, when he's upside down with his good arm crossing his chest. The rest is because Sasuke—I mean Kanda--wouldn't look at smiles, and then Lavi had the perfect reason to tie into the story.

WARNING: This is my first time basically writing what amounts to erotica. Although this is primarily an exercise in writing erotic scenes, it was also to accustom me to using certain words in a literary setting, having just read a rather graphic and brilliant Ian McEwan book solely about the virgin honeymoon of a couple set in the beginning of the 20th century. A frank discussion of sex is something still uncomfortable for me to write, and frankly (since I am being frank) I find Allen adorable, Lavi funny/sexy and since I aim to write queer fiction, of course I'll pair two boys together. Now on with the porn show!

**ADDED WARNING:** Some people may find the graphic realism of the sex scene to be unsettling. For those of you who are virgins, sorry to burst your bubble, but that's how things happen. As to people who dislike the change up of the seme/uke dynamic, I have only this to say. The seme/uke thing is a construct designed by Japanese women for Japanese women. Just remember, Yaoi boys are like unicorns. Pretty to look at, and completely unrealistic. I personally loathe the idea of preset sexual relationship dynamics following a regressive heteronormative paradigm that forces a person to be the male or the female in a relationship. One of the great things about being gay is that those roles get subverted, and typically lead to a partnership that is more stable and emotionally healthy because of it. So, if you worship the uke/seme concept, you should probably not read my stories, because I hate everything about it and will go out of my way to destroy it.

I actually really hope this doesn't violate definition of Mature.

Perfect Smile

Of all the Bookman skills Lavi possessed, his most complete and disarming one was smiling. Faking a smile was no easy task, certain muscle movements around the eyes were almost impossible to replicate without genuine amusement. Even the old man admitted Lavi's control of his smile had nearly reached the Bookman ideal of complete control: Perfect Mimicry. When Lavi smiled, he really smiled well; everything from his eyes to the way his neck would tense fooled other humans into reading the smile as true.

Armed with this weapon alone, Lavi would have made a somewhat competent Bookman. But the old man wasn't happy with just a smile, he wanted to Lavi to actually achieve the true Bookman ideal of complete facial control, to master the art of Perfect Mimicry. With that skill it was possible to feign every conceivable human emotion with complete sincerity, and much more. Such control seemed impossibly far away, especially when Lavi couldn't even completely control his emotions the way the old man could. So Lavi studied, and because his greatest weapon was his control of the smile, he studied the smiles of others the most.

The hardest part of achieving the Bookman ideal was overcoming the hurdle of shape becoming substance. To smile was to, eventually, feel happy. To cry was to, eventually, feel sorrow. In order to achieve ultimate control, Lavi would have to decipher to point at which his face became his emotions, even more so than the point at which his emotions would show on his face. He understood the latter, and the former continued to elude him.

Epiphanies were not something Lavi was given to, or rather, he had epiphanies all the time. It was decidedly difficult to determine which was which, or even if there was a difference between the two. Regardless, the idea had come to him, as so many ideas did, while he was observing people. Person. A person, a very particular person. A person who even if he weren't the sole focus of the old man and his presence in their capacity as Bookmen, would have captivated Lavi.

Allen Walker had a smile unlike any other Lavi had ever seen. To be sure, the sheer variety of smiles at the Black Church's headquarters would be enough to explore the entire breadth and width of displayed human emotion (from Kanda's decided lack thereof to Jerry's constant and consuming display of happy white teeth). But between his admittance to the Exorcist organization, and his constant traveling for as long as he can remember, Lavi thought he had seen all that human faces had to offer. From the condescending smiles of the rich to the traumatic smile on a child who had watched everything die around her, he really, truly had thought he'd seen it all.

Trust Allen Walker to throw a wrench into not just his plans, but also his very thoughts. All the same, Allen's smile had captivated him the first time he saw it. He'd seen sorrow in smiles before, he'd seen acceptance of loss and compassion, and yet… In Allen's smile, he saw something more. He saw a love that could encompass the world, and he saw the pain that was the foundation of it. In all his time looking at other people, he'd never seen such a capacity for love filled with sadness.

Most importantly, he had never seen a smile so sad, with so much room to grow, that made him want to fill it. He wanted to be the reason Allen smiled, and he wanted that smile to grow out of sadness, and blossom into joy. There was a light waiting to be lit behind Allen's eyes, and Lavi knew that if he could only open a bond between them, he could spark that light.

Honestly, he could care less how many rules of being a Bookman he would violate. Part of studying history was learning from it, and despite what the old Panda said, Lavi knew what happened to people who repressed and denied strong feelings. Besides, he had a plan.

Watching Allen, watching that smile, so amazing in the reaction it inspired in him, he began to wonder what Allen felt when he smiled. So he decided to begin schooling his face to mimic the smiles of others. He started simply, pretending to smile like Jerry, then Komui, working his way through the support staff of the organization, and then moving on to the Exorcists. Of course the practice was more complex, but in schooling his face to mimic others in the privacy of his room, staring at his mirror, he would meditate on their personalities, and after long hours of trying to mold his face and his mind, he would smile, and if the smile matched, he was successful.

The final step before Allen was, of course, Kanda. Despite the amount of apathy and anger Kanda displayed, Lavi found his smile most challenging because of the amount of sophisticated emotional systems behind it. Each of Kanda's emotions were tied together, so it wasn't that Kanda didn't smile, so much as he couldn't smile, there was just too much going on inside his head. Lavi stared at his reflection, and continued to stare until the rest of his room faded away, until he saw only his eyes, and then he began to "change" his eyes, pretending they were Kanda's eyes, it was Kanda's face, and Kanda's thoughts.

Anger was growing somewhere, not just general anger that Kanda carried next to himself, but… Ah. A fascinating aspect of the meditation exercises was that Lavi's own subconscious couldn't help but interact with the faux-personality he constructed, and Kanda was most definitely rebelling against the idea that he was practice for Allen Walker.

If anything, that proved it. Lavi was ready. Steady, callused hands smoothed out his Exorcist jacket, he closed his eyes, and began to breathe rhythmically. In and out, he could feel the air moving through his sinuses and lungs, in and out. Thoughts fell away, Kanda peeled off like a lotus blossom, and Lavi's mind was left bare and ready.

First he concentrated on his arm, the arm that was his anti-Akuma weapon. The way it felt to have it be not-his-arm, but his arm. Slowly he began to build emotion around his arm, around the fact that his arm was part of him, older than his memories, and that it had pain layered throughout. Shame, guilt, fear, sorrow… Lavi counted them all, and built on them.

Here was the pain of Manna's death. This was the happiness at being saved. Now the feeling of betrayal and suffering at the hands of a guardian, here the smile of a beautiful girl. Acceptance at the Black Church, the torture of endless walking, and all the knowledge he had of Allen's life (and it was a very extensive collection of facts) he used to be a foundation for emotion, until finally he was ready. This was it. All of the system he had constructed was there, in his head, all his thoughts laid out and bare. This would be his mastery of this technique, the ultimate Bookman ideal. To become so in-tune with your own thoughts you could transform them into another's.

It was the ability to see and record history through another person's eyes. Complete objective experience of another person's subjective experience, the closest a Bookman could render history into pure fact. The pinnacle and the paradigm of being a Bookman was here, in his hands. Cool air streamed across his face, and with that gentle awareness brought him back to his physical body, away from the dangerous thought he was about to have, that despite achieving the old man's ultimate goal, fulfilling his own destiny, he was only doing this to make Allen happy.

Instead, he opened his eyes, and stared until the room and his own reflection receded, and gradually Allen's face replaced his own. Perfection had been reached. With an almost audible snap, his face matched Allen's most neutral expression and merged with his own version of Allen's mind.

Then Lavi tried to smile.

"I'm completely serious, Allen. You should get a girlfriend," Lenalee said in the wise tones of a teenage girl who knew far more than her teenage boy friend.

"You think so?" Allen's voice was neutral.

"Yes, I do. It would help you to relax and… you deserve it."

"I can't endanger someone by falling love with them."

"Everyone is in danger, though. The Earl's plans are to kill humanity, Allen, not just you."

"Yes, but…"

"Allen, you are not going to die to save us all. We're going to live through this."

"I know, you're right, Lenalee."

"This is exactly why you need a girlfriend, though. Look how sad you are, you need someone to brighten up your day!"

"But I have my friends for that, just like you."

"Ah, well—that is," Lenalee stammered, her face turning pink. "Yes, but you need—oh!" She stomped her foot and the calm compassionate demeanor was replaced by an exasperated teenage girl. "You need to stop being so serious and kiss someone. Otherwise you'll turn into Kanda." Allen's face grew mock horrified.

"What a terrible fate," he exclaimed, and Lenalee giggled.

"How about this, Allen. Why do you think I think you need a girlfriend?" Lenalee asked him, sounding very pleased with herself. Her relationship to her mad scientist brother was definitely more apparent at certain times, particularly when she took such an unorthodox method of attacking a problem.

"Well," Allen began speaking slowly, "I think that you think I should have a girlfriend because I need someone close to me who I can be intimate with in a variety of ways: someone I can talk to whenever about whatever, someone who I can be physically close to and help me become unstressed and comforted, someone strong who can protect themselves and not worry me, someone who is kind and clever and can make me laugh when I'm sad." He stopped to look off at nothing in particular, perhaps just to stare at the seemingly endless pit of the great circular room. Lenalee made a small sound indicating her agreement, and after a beat Allen began to speak again.

"You think I need a girlfriend so that I can learn what love is, or at least see the difference between honest affection and whatever my Master had with all the women I met. You think that I need someone who will come to me and give me warmth when I'm cold, without me having to ask." He looked up at Lenalee, and his eyes were so kind and sad she wanted to cry (Allen sometimes wondered what the strange expression people got in their eyes when they looked at him and weren't afraid/disgusted).

"You think I need someone who can take care of me, who will hold me and cradle me. But I think you're wrong." Lenalee tilted her head in confusion. "I mean, I'd like someone to love, but I have friends who are all those things for me. And… If I fell in love, it would have to be with someone who understood me." Now he reached out and took her hand in his cursed, warped hand. Lenalee didn't pull away, and she could see how it made him glad, that she knew and accepted him. But his eyes didn't lose their sadness.

"And I think, that you also think, that I like—" while he spoke the words his thumb circled her palm and all the moisture left her mouth. Would he say what she hoped he'd say? Would he end the sentence with "you, and I do," or "you, and I'm sorry…"

"ALLEN," and the two Exorcists both jumped in surprise, looking across the circular tower to see an extremely distraught Lavi. With a short hop he was on the rail and then shooting across the open area on his hammer's lengthening handle. His face was wet, and both teenagers became very concerned that Lavi, of all people, was crying. Shrinking down so fast it looked like it would recoil and tear Lavi's arm off, his hammer was promptly dropped the ground, making a dull clang that shook the floor and echoed throughout the entire tower.

"Allen," the Bookman apprentice said the other boy's name again, much softer, and his tone caused Allen to blink in confusion. Lenalee stepped back, something about the two suddenly made her feel like the most obnoxious of intruders. In a manner that defied any sort of description she could give, she sensed an intimate connection blossomed between the two boys. Allen's hand dropped from hers like a leaf falling in autumn, suddenly and gently. Completing a gentle swing, his hand rose up like a flower shooting to the sky in spring, straining towards Lavi like a sunflower to the sun.

Folding his own larger hand over Allen's anti-Akuma weapon Lavi suddenly pulled Allen forward. With her presence completely gone from the awareness of the two boys before her, she withdrew quietly to a subtle and suitable watching spot.

"Allen," Rabi said a third time, his voice muffled by thick white hair and the blue cloth hood of Allen's jacket. Despite being definitely shorter than Lavi, with the way Allen held himself, Lavi unconsciously considered the boy of equal stature to himself, or rather, until he considered the height difference between them, he did not think of Allen as smaller. Holding Allen tightly to his chest, enfolding the slender but so very strong, supple, body against his own, the inches he had on Allen were apparent, and just made a feeling of tender possessiveness ring through him. The old Panda would have an embolism seeing him act this way, betraying every tenet of being a Bookman. Yet, and yet, and yet… If Lavi saw his way through this, if everything paid off right and the gamble went just so… Well, he'd get to prove the old Panda wrong, get that much closer to being the ultimate Bookman, and he'd get the boy who was possibly the most important person to him—the entire world, he meant.

"Why, Lavi? What's wrong?" And at that, Lavi began to laugh. It was a low, sad laugh, more a chuckle than laugh but too vocal, too high in the throat to be anything but a laugh.

"This is gonna sound weird as all hell, but—your smile, Allen. It's a Bookman thing, I was practicing your smile, and I just couldn't stand it," he said, and if anything held Allen even tighter. Allen stiffened so obviously that Lenalee frowned as she edged away, almost drawing back to offer her own embrace to Allen.

"What does that mean, you couldn't stand it?" Lavi sensed that Allen's confusion was edging into negative emotional territory. Head drawn back, he released his death grip on the other boy.

"I can't tell ya everything, but… I try and think like another person, and then, I make my face like theirs, and if I do it just right I can—it's almost like I get in their head, ya know?" Telling Allen this automatically disqualified him from being a Bookman, if the old Panda could see him, he knew he would have to fight for his life, as he was now a pure liability. The old man wouldn't kill him, but he would try and seal away his innocence and his memories. There were ways to destroy a man's thoughts and leave his mind intact. That was something else Bookmen knew.

"That's really—" Allen tried to speak, taking his time with each word.

"Yeah, I know," Lavi interrupted him with a disarming grin. "Thing is, my best facial expression is the smile, ya know?" He tossed Allen a careless grin, which quickly faded as Allen stared at him somewhat horrified looking. "Ah no, see this is—damn it, listen, Allen, if I smile at you, I want you to know, I'm not lying. Not to you, never to you. I could be killed just for revealing these secrets to you, so please, believe me, it's really important to me that you believe me." Words babbled together so fast he wasn't sure he made any sense, but Allen went from horrified to concerned and now he was hugging Lavi.

"I believe you—just, please, tell me, why my smile made you react like this."

"Thing is, I was pretending to be you, because," _I think you're so special that loving you will unlock the secret of perfect mimicry that only the original Bookmen were said to possess_, "I couldn't stop thinking about your smile. Ya gotta understand, I've seen a lotta smiles, but yours I can't get out of my head, and that's never happened before. So I had to know, how do you feel that you smile like you do? How can someone with so much love be filled with so much sadness, cuz it ain't right. And I—I can't pretend to know your pain, Allen, but I think I touched it and God help me I can't let you keep smiling like you do. I'm gonna give you a smile without sadness, Allen." At some point, Lavi had turned his face away from Allen's, letting down the number of walls he had to let this much emotion out made him a bit of a coward, so he'd looked at some point on the wall that bore no resemblance to pale blue-gray eyes that cut into him.

Now he looked back. For a second, he was terrified Allen was about to—well he didn't know quite what he thought Allen was about to do, but he was terrified because the other boy's eyes had gone quite blank. After a second he relaxed as he realized Allen was just temporarily lost in thought.

Allen blinked himself out of his gentle reverie, dismissing the overheard words his master had said all those years ago.

_"It's not that I don't care for the boy, you know I do. Sometimes though, I look at him and the way he just tries to smile at the world around him, and I wonder if it wouldn't have been better for me to let him die, just knowing that I'd saved his father from being an Akuma."_

Cross had spent a great deal of time with that particular woman, and apparently had visited her many times before. Allen had been curious what sort of woman could possibly keep his master's attention in such a manner, and instead overheard something he had definitely not supposed to be aware of.

The worst part was he remembered thinking Cross was right, and some nights he still thought his master should have done that, and just let him go.

Silence had drawn out for long enough that Allen, desperate at this point to break the heavy mood that hung over them (and thankful that Headquarters was so large and filled with so few people, all of whom stuck to their specific zones within the building, that despite being out in the open they had near total privacy) dropped his arms from Lavi's sides and shrugged with a cheesy grin on his face.

"What do you mean, Lavi, you make me smile all the time. Like the last time you drew on Kanda and made him look like a girl with really bad makeup," Allen said, infusing as much good humor into his voice as possible. He didn't want to talk about this with Lavi, he wanted to get away and go to his room and cry where he didn't have to let the other boy see him.

"That's not what I meant, Allen," Lavi said, his eyes and voice soft as new-fallen snow. "I mean…I want to be there, no, I need to be there, for you. Taking away bits of sadness from you every day, and adding bits of happiness, until that smile of yours lives up to what I know it can be." The red-head refused to let the conversation become frivolous. Moisture accumulated in his eyes and his cursed eye ached, Allen dimly realized. It even looked like Lavi's eye glistened with unshed tears as well. Emptiness crawled achingly into existence within his chest, and a matching painful absence appeared in his throat as well.

"Lavi…" And Allen bent himself fully into Lavi's embrace, because what could he say to that? And indeed, it felt good to let Lavi hold him, to be surrounding by another person who supported and cared for him without malice or—Allen began to giggle.

"Allen?" Lavi drew his head up to look down at the other boy who also lifted his head up.

Lenalee had not been able to understand most of what the two said to each other, but she could tell when two people were exchanging intimate conversation, and if she was not mistaken… She could see what was happening, and it made her want to cry for two reasons, because she knew Lavi, and she knew Allen, and she knew that Lavi was good for Allen and that if she'd really, truly had more than just a silly weak crush on him she should have done what Lavi was doing and said something. Why hadn't she just come out and said something? Was it because she wasn't sure of her feelings? She liked Allen a lot, she knew that much, and he was cute, but…

"Why," came a soft but strong, and contemptuous, male voice from directly behind her, "are you watching them?" Without looking, Lenalee reached back and flicked Kanda on the nose before he could blink.

"Be quiet, I'm trying to listen." Allen had started laughing, but not in any sort of way that Lenalee thought was healthy. Well, if Lavi didn't take care of it, he didn't deserve Allen and… So she resolved, the second Lavi made a mistake with his pursuit of Allen, she would make her move. Clearly Allen wasn't able to read between the lines or make the first move, just watching his interaction with Lavi and the fact that they hadn't let each other go and yet still had not kissed each other was proof of that.

_Boys…_ She smiled sadly, because really, they were such silly creatures. Heck, she could look behind herself and find another prime example of boy silliness

"Allen, what are you laughing about?" Lavi's voice was inquisitive, devoid of anything but simple inquiry because he wanted to know what made Allen happy, just because it made Allen happy. Allen had known he had friends, had it proven to him and tested again and again. But here and now, finally, the message had hit home. People cared for him in a way that didn't involve anything else but affection for him, Allen Walker. And really, wasn't that all the Lenalee thought he needed from a "girlfriend?"

"I was just laughing, because earlier—Lenalee and I were talking—she insisted that I needed a girlfriend to be truly happy. But really, all I need are people who care about me, just like you, Lavi," Allen said cheerfully, his eyes closing and his head tilting just so slightly to the side as his lips curved up ever so delicately into a pleased state.

Something that had been brewing inside of Lavi suddenly came into fruition. A wave of emotion that had begun the first time he had to spend time memorizing the life history of a boy he didn't even know, to when he first met the boy, first fought with the boy, first laughed with him, lived with him, traveled with him, relied upon him, mourned him, fought for him, saved him, was saved by him, bonded with him, commiserated with him, mourned with him, and, finally, to when he tried to become him.

Lavi loved him. So while Allen's eyes were closed and these feelings still overruled his common sense (and really, hadn't they been doing that for quite some time now? This was really just logical progression) he pressed his lips to Allen's. Both boys were surprised to the extent that they did not hear the heartbroken gasp torn from Lenalee's lips or the softly uttered: "bwah?" from Kanda's mouth.

In the space of a second, a million and one things went through Lavi's mind. What would the old man/the Church/the world/his family/his friends/Allen think, what would happen here/5 minutes/a week/a year/when the war is over, depending on if Allen pushed him away/kissed back/slapped him/ran off crying/killed him/went crazy/fucked him right there, and did he like it what was he thinking would this work out was it the right thing to do did he fail as a Bookman would he be kicked out of the Exorcists would everything work out all right and—and would he make Allen happy?

For Allen there was only this: Lavi wanted Allen, all of the good and all of the bad. Lavi wanted him, and Lavi wanted to make him happy. Nothing else mattered, certainly not little things like gender or rules. So Allen unwrapped his arms around Lavi's back and instead grabbed onto his shoulders from the back, so he could pull himself up and forward into the kiss, opening his mouth and pushing Lavi back until he hit the railing.

The little noise Allen made as he launched into the kiss made Lavi's knees knock, and, although he had closed his eyes and couldn't see it, Allen flush. The muted throaty whine translated directly into Lavi's body, and so he groaned back in response, just as he grabbed Allen's shoulder with one hand and his perfect bubble shaped ass in the other. Now Allen positively squeaked and broke apart from Lavi's lips.

"L-Lavi," the white-haired boy stuttered, "I—uh—that is," Allen's words stopped rushing out of his mouth as the hand that had just grabbed him in such an invasive manner placed one callused finger on his lips. Lavi's finger created a stretch of warmth and direct skin contact from the tip of his nose down to his chin. The contrast with the gentle soft touch of Lavi's mouth was stark and somehow arousing. Allen became increasingly aware of his body, from the crown of his head down to the tips of his toes, so focused on the present that awareness of all other things faded.

"Sorry, you're just so," Lavi tried to find the words and decided kissing was easier and somehow more articulate.

"If you two reprobates are done disgusting us with your display of affection, I'd ask you take it to your rooms." Allen began to flail about, as Kanda Yuu suddenly was only a couple feet away from them.

"Oh hey, Yuu, didn't see you there."

"What do you mean, reprobates?"

"Only that Yuu hasn't been properly kissed in ages."

"You should keep such manifestations of your relationship in private, such things are not approved of around here."

"Kanda…" Alan said and the blue-haired warrior turned to glare at him.

"Don't read into it, I do not care what you do or what happens to you. Just keep your actions and your self out of my way unless ordered."

"Wow, Allen, I don't think I've ever seen Kanda grow to care about someone as quickly as you."

"If you say so. I say a well intentioned jerk is still a jerk."

"That may be, but he still gave some good advice."

"Lavi, I don't know if I—"

"Then we don't. I still want to spend time with you." And then Allen smiled, small and soft just like his lips. Lavi did not care that Allen still looked sad under his smile, that would change. Really, Allen was only just starting to be around people who could fill that void, from Kanda to, well, himself. Really, just between himself and Lenalee—_Lenalee. Shit._

"What?" Allen asked, and Lavi couldn't help his attention sliding over to where he now could pinpoint Lenalee was watching them. His hand on the back of Allen's head tightened his fingers so that the other boy couldn't turn to look. Tears streaked Lenalee's face (she even looked beautiful while crying, Lavi noticed) while her right hand clasped the cloth above her left breast so tightly Lavi could see her whitened knuckles. Pushing Allen's mouth into his collarbone he stared at Lenalee, who took the hand covering her mouth down make a fist symmetrical to the one above her heart. She wore the smile of someone who loved another a great deal, even loved enough to let that person go.

"Raphi," Allen tried to say his name and came out decidedly muffled. Lavi cleaned his heart of any sympathy for Lenalee, he couldn't afford to feel for her just now, and glared at her. The pain in her smile increased as the smile vanished to be replaced with embarrassment. She turned and took off running, and now Allen was struggling against Lavi's grip.

"Lenalee," Allen shouted but despite freeing his face Lavi would not let him go. "Lavi, what the hell?"

"You don't want to talk to her right now."

"She's upset, she needs—"

"Unless you plan on rejecting me and kissing her, you'll only make her feel worse," Lavi hated to sound so cold, but this was how things had to be (and it was sickeningly wonderful to see Allen jerk at those words and the idea of rejecting Lavi). Lenalee's pain at losing Allen would be better served by intervention from another arena, maybe Kanda would even unwind enough to speak with her. _Right, and the Earl might decide to reincarnate people out of the goodness of his heart and not turn them into killing machines._ More likely, he hoped Komui wouldn't sick his latest science project on him and/or Allen.

"But," Allen looked up at him, and Lavi almost dropped to his knees so he could begin begging to do anything to appease the imploring look in Allen's eyes. Resistance to Allen's eyes was waning fast so Lavi did the only thing he could think of and kissed the white-haired boy again. Allen would have none of it, and kept his mouth closed. Lavi leaned back regretfully, but also aware that Allen had not unwrapped his arms from Lavi's embrace.

"Please, not out here anymore," and he began to pull away, turning and dragging Lavi behind him. Allen's room was very close by, and Allen practically shoved Lavi through the doorway before slipping in behind him and locking the door. Raising one eyebrow hopefully, Lavi began to unbutton his coat. Unfortunately for him, Allen advanced on him quickly and slapped him sharply on the face.

"Okay, ouch. What was that for, _Moyashi_?"

"You knew Lenalee was there."

"That's not fair, though. I only knew she was there after I stopped kissing you. I mean, I didn't notice she was there. I thought she'd left after I—ah—you know, came up to you crying and started hugging you to death." Lavi had tilted his head to the side with one hand behind his head, eyes closed with a large sheepish grin. And because it was Allen, he let the smile be completely honest. Seeing the difference between a real and fake smile with Lavi was impossible, so really, there was no way Allen could see his sincerity. Honest emotions fed honest relationships, which was important to Lavi, so when he wasn't lying to Allen, he was honestly honest.

The difference there was important, when dealing with Bookmen. Allen didn't know any of this, of course, but when Lavi looked at him like that, he wanted to believe and trust him, and for now he let himself want it freely. So he went and sat down on the bed and looked up expectantly at Lavi, because although he didn't quite know what he was doing, and wasn't quite ready to trust other people, he knew what he wanted to do and he knew he wanted to trust. So he was willing to try.

Reading into Allen's face and his body was easier for Rabi than probably anyone else alive (except maybe his master, Cross was supposed to have… immensely well hidden depths) and so part of him was glad that he was the one pursuing the boy into his bed, rather than Lenalee, because he understood Allen better. Most of him was glad he was pursuing Allen because right now, looking at him, the way his hair was slightly mussed and those big sad eyes were looking right at him, he wanted to be the one who touched Allen.

Sex, as a topic of discussion, saw little of the light of day in these times. As a student of history, Lavi knew that it had not always been so, and in fact some current deviant sexual practices came out of the sexual repression that was currently in-vogue in the western world. All of that aside, Lavi knew how a man's body worked, and he knew how to work a man's body, and God Almighty he wanted to work Allen's body. Scaring Allen with moving too fast in no way was part of this plan.

Besides, a meal is much more filling, tasty and memorable if you take your time with eating it. Savor each bite as you work your way into the heart of your plate, resisting the urge to devour in a quick burst no matter how gratifying it might be.

_Enough food metaphors, now I'm hungry._ Even while his stomach was letting him know that eating food would be a nice way to appease its hunger, his body, his mind and the hardness in his crotch hungered for something else.

"I just didn't want to hurt her. Why does something that makes me feel good have to hurt her? It's not fair," the younger boy said and Lavi gently pushed him down on the bed. Leaning over his body, he laid a delicate lips only kiss on Allen's mouth, which made the other boy flush. One of the things people didn't always realize about sex was that restraint made things both more intimate and erotic.

"Budge over, ya_Moyashi_," Lavi said and Allen promptly thumped him on the arm. The sheets and pillow smelled like the boy who now lay against him, a smell that Lavi couldn't describe beyond saying it smelled like Allen, and it smelled wonderful.

"Lavi, what are we doing?"

"… Cuddling?"

"No, I mean in general, what is this," Allen gestured between the two of them.

"… Us not having sex?"

"I'm going to hit you again."

"… Us about to have sex?"

Allen made good on his promise.

"Ouch, that hurt."

"Then don't make unfunny jokes."

"I have never made an unfunny joke in my life, I'll have you know I am very humorous. People laugh at me all the time," Lavi's eyes were twinkling and Allen had to grin back at him.

"That," Lavi said, darting in to kiss that smiling mouth like a hummingbird feeds off a flower, "is what this is. Me making you smile, you smiling, and me finding it unbearably attractive."

"You think I'm attractive?" Allen's voice had an honest yearning in it. He knew that he was not ugly by any means, but between his arm and the curse on his face, people tended to avert their eyes anyways. The only person who had said he was cute in a long time was Jerry, part of why he loved the cook so much (also, immense amounts of food, another reason for Allen-love). But this was more than being cute, and far more than just looking past the deformities Allen lived with, it was an appreciation of his physical being. Warmth spread all over his body and suddenly he felt almost shy.

"I think that if I were an artist, I would paint you, if I were a sculptor, I would… sculpt you, if I were a writer I would compose you poetry," Lavi said, "but I am just an Exorcist who is supposed to become a Bookman. And if I've learned one thing, it's that words are nothing without actions to support them." He paused and waiting for Allen to say something. The other boy blinked and then looked somewhat confused.

"And?" Lavi didn't know what he wanted to do more, screw Allen into the mattress for being so unbelievably beautiful in his naivety, or laugh because the boy really could not take a hint. So Lavi pulled him flush against his body and put his forehead against Allen's so that their eyes stared directly into each other.

"Can I show you how attractive I think you are? May I touch you, Allen?" Lavi's speech patterns and syntax had been going every which way for some time now, the downside of a Bookman letting his guard down. All of his past disguises and accents were tumbling without order or care out of his mouth.

"Touch? I don't—oh," Allen's mouth formed a large O as his eyes widened. Lavi had pushed his cock against Allen's, and the response on Allen's part was immediate as he became hard too.

"Touch," Lavi said in a throaty deep voice. A shiver went down Allen's spine that rooted itself at the base of his sex. He couldn't ever remember being this hard before in his life, and an ache was rapidly building in his testicles that matched the ache in his chest. At the same time, his stomach felt like it was filled with violent bees rather than butterflies.

"Is this okay?" Allen was about to ask what "this" was, when Lavi rocked his body, pushing their straining erections together. Allen could feel Lavi's rigid cock lying right next to his own, shoving against his own. Pleasure existed in his groin that pulsed along his entire body, and he couldn't stop himself from rocking back and forth into Lavi. He could feel a tightness building a need that was—

With a yell he came, an orgasm so intense his vision dimmed around the edges and for a second he existed in a state of Nirvana. No thoughts, no emotion, nothing but his body consumed in a single undying instant of pleasure, passing away altogether too soon.

"Well, I guess it was okay." Lavi's voice called Allen back to Earth, where he immediately flushed a deep red, ashamed of himself and his lack of control. Pinpricks in his eye had him turning away from Lavi, and pulling out of that tight embrace where his trousers were soaked in his own sexual fluids. He wanted to cry and he didn't quite know why, but Lavi's strong-callused hands caught him and brought his face back up around to kiss, once again.

"Hey, don't be upset, okay? You're very new to all of this, and it's normal to—uh—well be premature at times." Allen sniffled and Lavi put his thumb on the other boy's chin with his index finger gently pushing it up to look into Lavi's face. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Good, because there is only one way to deal with premature ejaculation," Lavi said in a very knowledgeable tone, like a professor lecturing on some obscure topic. "And that is to ejaculate many, many, many, many more times. Are you up to the challenge, _Moyashi_?"  
"You know," Allen said, considering, "I think I might be." Then he smiled at Lavi, with shyness barely covering wanton desire. Another kiss, this one lingered as the two tasted each other.

"Good," Lavi said. His voice was husky and Allen could feel Lavi's breath as warm air ghosted down the edge of his ear and onto his neck. "Now, let's get you out of this mess." Lavi practically shucked Allen of his pants and tossed the sticky mess behind him without looking. Allen made a small noise in protest but then his shirt was being pulled up and off and quite suddenly he was wearing only his under-garment. Lavi's eye surveyed the territory it had picked out, and found it to be quite pleasing.

Already Allen's wet underwear was being strained by a growing erection, and so Lavi danced his fingers down Allen's sides to place both of them on either side of the boy's growing excitement. Allen made a sound somewhere between a coo and a moan, and Lavi shuddered at the sound. Every noise that came out of Allen's mouth raked its way up his spine and into his brain, only to shoot back down the way it came up and settle firmly on his cock.

He leaned forward and placed another kiss on Allen's red lips, pushing his torso down and sliding his legs up to remove the last bit of clothing on the white-haired boy's body. Interesting, the hair was the same color all over, even if Allen was really very hairless on most of his body. So very smooth all over, his skin was like fine silk stretched over heat and muscle.

"Lavi," Allen said as the other boy traced a hand over the white haired bush and along an engorged vein on the side of his penis. Suddenly, Lavi wanted to see what his own pubic hair would look like, that fiery red, alongside Allen's stark white strands. Not just wanted, he needed. Standing back off the bed, ignoring the creak of the mattress and Allen's petulant "where are you going?" He wasn't going anywhere, except maybe inside of Allen—no, that wouldn't happen this time. Risking this was not in the plan, he would be inside Allen when the other boy wanted him to be, and no sooner, but maybe a little later, because teasing just makes it that much more fun.

With hands that barely trembled (his hands were shaking? He was no naïve virgin like Allen, why was he nervous?) he quickly undid his jacket and shirt, letting them fall to the floor. He looked at the naked boy on the bed, the way Allen's eyes were somewhat glazed over with lust, and all thoughts of doing a slow striptease vanished, he needed his cock out of his clothes and touching Allen right now.

And if it was obvious that Allen wasn't ready for Lavi to be inside of him, that was okay. Because he'd already cast his eyes around the room, found something that would serve as lubricant (Allen had to oil the area where his anti-Akuma weapon met his skin or else it became terribly flaky and itchy) and come to a decision. Pushing Allen's head down, Lavi knelt on the bed and stretched Allen's legs out spread-eagle. One astonished gasp later, his mouth was on the most sensitive part of Allen's body, still tasting of his semen from just a bit ago.

Lavi lavished attention on Allen's cock, using every trick he knew to make the younger boy writhe and moan, his hands grabbing at Lavi's head and the pillows behind his own head. Legs would rise up on either side of Lavi and tense before extending so much that his toes were spreading apart, before re-tensing and grabbing the sheets with his feet as he drew them up. The wild almost bucking motion made it a bit difficult to concentrate, he was trying to surprise Allen after all, with what his right hand was doing to prepare his ass for penetration. Allen couldn't see him or really see anything. His eyes looked but did not process, every bit of his mind was focused solely on how good Lavi's mouth felt, and how hot and wet and Lavi cupped one of Allen's testicles and gently squeezed it. The slight pressure made Allen moan the loudest yet, and then Lavi's mouth wasn't on his cock anymore, it was licking its way up his stomach.

Lavi could have spent a century just nuzzling his face against Allen's waist, the view of his erection was fantastic and although his hip bones and torso looked delicate, they felt strong and hard. A brief detour was made to Allen's left nipple and then Lavi shifted so that his cock was resting on Allen's, and he wrapped his hand around both of them. Allen latched onto Lavi's neck with both arms and shuddered in pleasure, he could feel Lavi's excitement like it was his own.

"Lay down, and close your eyes," Lavi said, and Allen, his eyes wide and trusting, did so. Lavi grinned and position Allen's cock so that it was right under him, and then (because Lavi was no virgin and knew how to operate his body) he sat down, hard.

Lips that had seconds ago been on top of his, adorable little lips with that adorable little tongue, parted into a yell. The noise that tore itself out of Allen's throat was loud, so it definitely qualified as a yell, but it was also a primal sort of sound, a grunt or a bark that shook Allen's entire body because he was inside of Lavi.

If he thought Lavi's mouth was hot, if he thought Lavi's mouth was wet, if he thought Lavi's mouth was tight, he didn't know what to think of Lavi's ass. For a moment they didn't move, Lavi sitting on his knees, his erection standing proud and red. It was almost like his cock was now Allen's, with Allen inside of him so far that he could feel it when Lavi wrapped Allen's hand around him and he began to stroke the red-head. Lavi tightened and tossed his head back, making a moaning sigh of contentment.

"Lavi, your so—oh God," and Allen didn't know that people could feel like this during sex, that the act wasn't just basically masturbation with another person, that sex was a communion when treated right. He was Lavi and Lavi was him, they moved between each other and broke the boundaries established by their physical bodies.

"Are you ready for this?" Lavi asked, his voice tight with need. Allen looked at him with hysterically wide eyes.

"There's more?" he asked in shock and wonder, and Lavi couldn't help but laugh. After a second Allen began to laugh too, because he could feel Lavi laughing, the slight bounce on his stomach and the way Lavi's diaphragm expanded so he could breathe and laugh and how that motion went straight to Allen's cock and he felt Lavi laughing inside him while he was inside of Lavi.

And then Lavi bounced. Once, and then again. Each time he did, Allen saw stars the pleasure was so intense. His hands fell off Lavi's cock and he reached instead for Lavi's hands. The other boy stopped moving and wove his fingers with Allen's, so that they stared at each other for a second. And then, Allen began to cry.

"It's okay, Allen, just let it out," Lavi said gently, and Allen grabbed the back of Lavi's head and sat up to kiss him and clutch his shoulders and neck because all of this was just too much, so very much and so very confusing and so very wonderful and he just could not stop crying.

So Lavi kissed his tears away and moved his legs to more comfortably sit in Allen's lap. Reaching one hand down to where his cock rubbed against Allen's stomach, Lavi began to jerk himself off, with each motion moving on top of Allen. The white-haired boy's head was pressed against his shoulder, and Lavi could feel his breath, hard little gasps against his skin, just below where soft white hair tickled at his neck. With his other hand, Lavi reached around Allen's thin shoulders and stroked his back.

"I've got you, Moyashi, and I won't let you go." Seconds after that, Allen had to bite down a scream as the orgasm built inside of him. Somehow, Lavi sensed it too, and so that when Allen came with a violent intensity that almost shocked Lavi, Lavi's seed fell like hot rain on Allen's chest. Falling to his side, Lavi gave a great big sigh, while Allen sniffled, once again embarrassed at his own emotions. Lavi cupped his face with his hand and looked at him tenderly.

"You are so beautiful," he said, and Allen's flush turned from shame to bashful, which was odd considering he was still buried up to the hilt of his cock inside of Lavi. Sliding out of Lavi left Allen feeling cold, but then his head popped out of Lavi's ass, making a literal popping sound followed by what sounded suspiciously like a fart.

For a second the two boys just looked at each other, completely silent and still, and then Lavi smirked at Allen who began giggling. After a moment they both began to laugh, and Lavi grabbed Allen up into his embrace, and Allen was smiling at him. They laughed nearly so hard they couldn't breathe, until finally, they calmed down a bit. Still chuckling, Allen began to notice that his bed was a complete and utter mess, and that he now definitely knew what the smell of sex was like. He didn't care, he felt wonderful. So he kissed Lavi on the chin and smiled up at the older boy through his bangs. _What a little flirt he is_ Lavi thought, quite amused. Sure enough, it seemed that Allen was a natural in bed, and Lavi was going to enjoy exploring every inch of Allen at his leisure, most likely with his mouth. It would be a month long project, most likely, taking time each day to map a different part of Allen, staking out the areas that would make him moan this way, groan that way, or that he would look at Lavi and say in a dull tone "I'm sorry, Lavi, but you can stop that." Whatever, it didn't matter, what mattered was that he could do that to Allen, that he got to be with Allen and if that made Allen happy, then it was perfect. Everything was perfect.

"Strike!" Lavi yelled and Allen's mouth dropped open before he began laughing even harder. His eyes sparkled and for a brief moment, Allen displayed pure joy with nothing else tainting it, no sadness, no fear, and no terrible responsibility to save the world and kill the Earl. The Destroyer of Time was at peace, and nothing could have made Lavi happier than Allen's perfect smile.

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Well, I hope that was satisfactory for some people, lord knows the sap could suffocate you. It feels pretty rushed because I really had to get this out of my system (wrote this over the last 3 days) so I can go back to working on my big chapter stories. I'll have to come back to D.Grayman later... Oh God... I just had a terrible idea about pretty boys with white hair and Hitsugaya would give some Akuma a pretty wild time, wouldn't he? Someone please stop me.

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